The Scare

So I woke up on Saturday morning around 5:30am. I stood up to go to the bathroom and realized I was a bit more "leaky" than normal. I went to the bathroom to find out I was gushing blood, and my pants were completely soaked with blood. I screamed for my husband and said "I think I am miscarrying". I also said "maybe you should check the bed to see if there is any blood". I tried to clean myself up as best as I could so we could head to the ER. I didn't know what to think. It was such a large amount of blood and was so very clotty.
The moment that broke my heart the most was to go back into the bedroom and see my husband kneeling next to the bed (where there was stains) and he was starting to cry. This sight was so sad to me.
We got the the ER and waited and waited. Eventually the bleeding slowed and we finally got an ultrasound and a internal exam. We found the baby moving and the heart beating away. We also found that my cervix was closed. So everything was "fine". But what is the bleeding? I guess it is something called a hemotoma around the placenta that had been forming for a while. It may be completely gone, or I may continue to bleed.
I was officially diagnosed with a "threatened miscarriage" and was told to "take it easy". We have a much higher risk of having a full misscarriage now, but the hope is that all will be fine from now on.
We missed our extended family Christmas, that was dissapointing. But it was for the best. I am so incredibly blessed to say that I am still pregnant. It was quite the scare, but really turned out to be nothing. So by God's Grace, this journey continues.

Tomorrow I will be 11 weeks pregnant

This is an image of what baby size compares to.

I am experiencing some pretty bad morning sickness these days. I have some zofran to take to help, but it doesn't take it completely away. I hate complaining and being whiny about it. But it is no fun to feel hungover all the time. Maybe we could go with the "hair of the dog" mentalilty and have one of these to celebrate the lime. ;)

Two Milestones

Lilah drank the last drop of frozen breastmilk. I exclusively pumped for 8 months, she got breastmilk for almost 13 months. The last couple weeks we have been just giving her a little bit and getting her used to whole milk. Now it is all gone. :( It makes me a little sad. I am proud of what I accomplished for her. I don't know if it made a difference in her health to have exclusive breastmilk, I can never know that. But we did for sure save hundreds of dollars on formula, so that is great.
#2 milestone? I am done with progesterone in oil (PIO) shots and estrogen patches for this pregnancy. So now it is up to my body to keep the hormone levels right to keep this baby inside and growing strong. My ass is very happy to not be shot anymore, welts and bruises will eventually go away.
:)

10wks2days

So I didn't update last week. But last Monday on 12/7 we had our last appointment with our RE. We saw the baby moving and could start to distinguish the arms and legs. He/she was moving around quite a bit. I decided he/she loves to dance just like Big Sister.
I had my first OB appointment on Thursday. We again had an ultrasound and again saw a heartbeat and a dancing baby. So at this time we have a grape that flips around.
It is absurd to say this, but I actually felt movement over the weekend. It was one distinct flip I could feel. I am pretty certain it was what I felt. I know what if feels to have a baby move inside me. I could be totally out of my mind, but I will just believe it and pay attention to if anymore feelings come.
Pregnancy is going ok. I have been getting pretty bad morning sickness all day. I think it is getting a little bit better. Overall it is ok. I am pretty down about weight gain. I should have lost more weight before doing a treatment cycle. But I did not. So I just step on the scale and watch the number go up and my clothes don't fit. Getting depressed about weight gain in pregnancy isn't the ideal time. But for whatever reason it is rough on me right now. So I need to just "get over it" :). I am so blessed to be pregnant again, so so very blessed.

Lilah's words

I decided I should keep track of the words that Lilah says. So here is the list.
Lilah
Da-Da
Kitty
Done
Milk
Elmo
Yes you do not see Ma-Ma on the list. Rarely do I get a real "ma-ma". But Milk and Elmo both sound like Ma-Ma, so people are like "ooooh she said ma-ma". LOL I get to correct them and say "no that is milk". Why does she torment me?
I adore my baby girl. This age is so much fun. She is so funny and has a great personality. I enjoy watching her explore and learn about the world around her. She is getting a temper though. It is a bit hard to take the SCREAMS when something isn't going her way. This is something we need to figure out how to remedy, can it actually be remedied? Probably not, perhaps ear plugs are in our future.
One year old is such an awesome age. I just adore Lilah. :)